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	<title>Your thoughts or mine?</title>
	<description>twistedrose's journal</description>
	<language>en</language>
	<lastBuildDate>Mon,  4 Dec 2006 13:14:14 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>Agosto</title>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>Isang taon na pala ang lumipas.</p><p>Kamusta na kaya siya? </p><p>Nalungkot tuloy ako bigla.</p><p>Ayaw kong pagnilayan kung bakit.</p><p>*very much tempted to strike those lines out. </p><p><em>Okei! Balik sa trabaho!</em></p>]]></description>
		<link>http://tabulas.com/~twistedrose/953132.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon,  8 Aug 2005 02:22:50 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>Court Humor</title>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>mula kay Sir A.</p><p><br />These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and<br />now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while<br />these exchanges were actually taking place.<br />&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Are you sexually active?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: No, I just lie there.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: What is your date of birth?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: July 15th.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: What year?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Every year.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Yes.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: I forget.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've<br />forgotten?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: How long has he lived with you?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Forty-five years.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that<br />morning?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: He said, &quot;Where am I, Cathy?&quot;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: And why did that upset you?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: My name is Susan.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the<br />occult?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: We both do.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Voodoo?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: We do.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: You do?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Yes, voodoo.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he<br />doesn't know about it until the next morning?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?<br />&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Yes.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: And what were you doing at that time?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp; &nbsp;Q: She had three children, right?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Yes.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: How many were boys?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: None.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Were there any girls?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Q: How was your first marriage terminated?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: By death.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: And by whose death was it terminated?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Q: Can you describe the individual?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: He was about medium height and had a beard.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Was this a male, or a female?<br />&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice<br />which I sent to your attorney?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Oral.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: No.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Did you check for blood pressure?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: No.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: Did you check for breathing?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: No.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the<br />autopsy?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: No.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?<br />&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law<br />somewhere.<br />&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;<br />Defendant: Judge, I want you to appoint me another lawyer.<br />Judge: And why is that?<br />Defendant: Because the public defender isn&rsquo;t interested in my case.<br />Judge (to public defender): Do you have any comments on your defendant&rsquo;s motion?<br />Public defender: I&rsquo;m sorry, Your Honor.&nbsp; I wasn&rsquo;t listening.<br />&nbsp;<br />&nbsp;<br />Q: Tell us your full name, please.<br />A: Mine?<br />Q: Yes, sir.<br />A: ***-5879<br />Q: Mr. Daniels, do you have problems hearing?<br />A: Not really.<br />Q: Where do you live?<br />A: Pardon</p>]]></description>
		<link>http://tabulas.com/~twistedrose/949158.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu,  4 Aug 2005 06:43:54 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>A Song for You</title>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>by The Carpenters</p><p>I've been so many places in my life and time<br />I've sung a lot of songs I've made some bad rhyme<br />I've acted out my love in stages<br />With ten thousand people watching<br />But we're alone now and I'm singing this song for you</p><p>I know your image of me is what I hope to be<br />I've treated you unkindly but darling can't you see<br />There's no one more important to me<br />Daring can't you please see through me<br />Cause we're alone now and I'm singing this song for you</p><p>You taught me precious secrets of the truth withholding nothing<br />You came out in front and I was hiding<br />But now I'm so much better and if my words don't come together<br />Listen to the melody cause my love is in there hiding</p><p>I love you in place where there's no space or time<br />I love you for in my life you are a friend of mine<br />And when my life is over remember when we were together<br />We were alone and I was singing this song for you<br />We were alone and I was singing this song for you<br /></p>]]></description>
		<link>http://tabulas.com/~twistedrose/947822.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Wed,  3 Aug 2005 00:46:30 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>Biting the Hands that Feed You</title>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>Ugh. Remind me never to listen to&nbsp;AM radio programs ever again. I'm having a bad morning.</p><p>And it's all Ra*l G*nzalez' fault.</p><p>Bwiset siya. Akala ko pa naman, magbabago na tingin ko sa kanya nung tirahin niya ang mga politiko't negosyanteng kayang-kaya namang pag-aralin ang mga anak nila sa ibang eskuwelahan but no, sinisiksik pa sila sa UP with the ordinary Isko't Iska. </p><p>Minus opportunity tuloy sa ibang mga worthy sanang&nbsp;high school graduates na gustong makapasok&nbsp;sa pinaka-ASTIG na university sa bansa.</p><p>Naalala ko tuloy nung hinatid ko dati si Loi sa UP para kumuha ng UPCAT. Alas-singko pa lang ng umaga, andami nang estudyante, magulang, manlalako ng taho, tindera ng pichi-pichi...&nbsp; AT!&nbsp;Naghuhumiyaw na mga matitingkad na Mercedes (read as Merseideez) Benz. </p><p>Sa paglalakad namin ni Loi papuntang Math Building,&nbsp;muntik na kaming mabangga&nbsp;ng isa sa mga MBng ito. Nagkatinginan tuloy kami nung isang cute na volunteer ng APO na nung time na yun ay nasa gilid ng kalsada at namimigay ng mga&nbsp;mapang pinagkasya sa 1/4 sheet of bond paper. </p><p>Napailing siya. Akala ko dahil hindi kami marunong tumawid. Pero dahil sa sinabi niyang: &quot;Hanep. State university.&nbsp;Natata-traffic&nbsp;dahil sa sobrang dami ng Mercedes,&quot; hindi na 'ko nagtago sa pinakamalapit na basurahan.</p><p>Gusto ko sanang&nbsp;tabihan ung cute na volunteer at tapikin sa likod. Mukhang may pinaghuhugutan kasi&nbsp;siya.&nbsp;</p><p>But&nbsp;that's not the reason why I'm ranting. Naiinis ako dahil ito na naman si R, mukhang hindi nakuntento sa pag-comment kay Kris Aquino. Ayun.&nbsp;UP students naman ang pinaggigiskitahan niya.</p><p>The comment, which was said in oh so many words, was:&nbsp;May utang na loob kayo sa gobyerno dahil sila nagpapaaral sa inyo. Pero bakit n'yo sila kinakalaban?</p><p>Excuse me. Hindi gobyerno nagpapaaral/nagpaaral sa'min. Taong-bayan ang nagpapaaral. Seventy percent of&nbsp;each student's&nbsp;tuition ay sagot ng taxpayers.</p><p>AT! pinag-aral nila kami hindi lang para malaman ang iba't ibang properties ng minerals or ang buhay ng iba't ibang famous writers sa mundo. Pinag-aral nila kami para malaman ang tama sa mali, para&nbsp;maisip&nbsp;agad ang epekto ng isang &quot;harmless&quot;&nbsp;call sa isang COMELEC official ng isang incumbent&nbsp;DURING ELECTION PERIOD, at para i-demand ang accountability ng isang opisyal sa mga mambobobto at hindi lang basta magpadala sa sori-sori.</p><p>Pinag-aral kami hindi lang para maging kinabukasan ng bayan, kundi para may magawa kami NGAYON para sa nagpapaaral sa'min. Isang paraan ng pagtanaw ng utang na loob ang pag-iisip, pag-aanalisa, at pagsasatinig ng kawalan ng katarungan para sa mga nagpapaaral sa'ming wala nang panahong mag-isip kasi tatlo ang trabaho nila sa isang araw.</p><p>Sabi nga ng isang kaibigan: I rally because it's my responsibility to those whose money are shed for my education. It's my own little way of giving it back to them.</p>]]></description>
		<link>http://tabulas.com/~twistedrose/942515.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 28 Jul 2005 00:25:00 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>Rock On!!!</title>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>Rock to School Concert last Friday. Went with lovable cousins (who, by the way, got me free tickets),&nbsp;Paula,&nbsp;and Froy. </p><p>Of course, we all got ourselves high with Bamboo.</p><p>Gad. He's sooo... er, stimulating. <img src="http://s.tabulas.com/ik/smilies/yellow/rasp.gif" border="0" />&nbsp;</p><p>Since Froy brought his Crosswing, we enjoyed some little gimmick-hopping.</p><p>Of course, Le Pavilion&nbsp;<img src="http://s.tabulas.com/ik/smilies/yellow/irked.gif" border="0" /> (almost got our eardrums broken from this really annoying fan behind us. Get a grip, girl.)</p><p>Blue Wave. (para mag-CR.)</p><p>Baywalk!&nbsp;<img src="http://s.tabulas.com/ik/smilies/yellow/big.gif" border="0" /> (Hindi ko sasabihing naglakad-lakad lang kami doon at nagpatintero sa Ped Xing dahil wala na kaming pera.)</p><p>SVI.&nbsp; (to visit Ate Cake and Kuya Mike's workplace.)</p><p>Metrowalk. Icebergs&nbsp;<img src="http://s.tabulas.com/ik/smilies/yellow/innocent.gif" border="0" /> (loved these really tasty country fries; found us a celebrity, Gabb from Qpids, I think) and Decades (hindi ko sasabihing hindi kami pumasok dito dahil may bayad.)</p><p>Roces' Decades (obviously, dahil may bayad sa Metrowalk, sa Roces kami bumagsak. little cousins got disappointed when they found out there wasn't a dancefloor for them to shake some booty.)</p><p>It's shameful to admit I just slept during the last stop.&nbsp;<img src="http://s.tabulas.com/ik/smilies/yellow/disapprove.gif" border="0" /> Gad. Was so tired. </p><p>I'm getting old. <img src="http://s.tabulas.com/ik/smilies/yellow/cry.gif" border="0" /></p>]]></description>
		<link>http://tabulas.com/~twistedrose/930673.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Sun, 17 Jul 2005 23:27:59 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>User-friendly</title>
		<description><![CDATA[<p>Hah. Not referring to anyone, really.</p><p>Blogdrive's banned in my PC. Officemate Belle suggested I try this while I still don't have access on my blogdrive&nbsp;here at the office and at home.</p><p>Cinemalaya next week. Have already set my eyes on &quot;Big Time&quot; and &quot;Room&nbsp;Boy&quot;. Just read&nbsp;a great review on them.&nbsp;&nbsp;Can't wait. </p>]]></description>
		<link>http://tabulas.com/~twistedrose/926195.html</link>
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		<pubDate>Wed, 13 Jul 2005 23:36:34 +0000</pubDate>
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