.: I put a lid on my FEELINGS

My Life in a Paradigm

Sun, 01 Mar 2009 14:47:36 +0000

Good, Fast and Cheap.

You can have any two, but never all three. As a designer, I got to understand the intricacies of the designer's holy triangle and I never got to go beyond it professionally.

But that's not the point. Upon further discussion, delving deeper into our personal lives, my previous colleague and office friend, Denise, realize that it's just Good/Fast/Cheap.

As much as we care to ignore it, the same paradigm can also be applied to relationship, or non-relationship.

Let's change Good/Fast/Cheap to the following:

Intellectual/Hot/Likes You.

Remember that.

So given the following data, somebody can like you and be smart, but most likely not Hot, somebody can like you and be hot, but not smart. Likewise, and sadly, somebody can be smart and hot but just does not like you.

In the same way, somebody can be smart but is not hot and does not like you, et al.

My Life Back Old School

Tue, 20 Jan 2009 21:38:55 +0000

Ever had that dream wherein you finished college then somebody informs you that you actually failed high school and you had to go back and retake 4th year again?

I did. For a week, and a few months after that; And attached to it was that awkward "first-week" high school jitters that linger even after I wake up, like I was on some kind of weird strain of marijuana. Worse yet, it felt so real that waking up was like an upcoming dread, "knowing" that I have to go to school with a bunch of teenagers again.

Good thing, it dawned on me that high school was over; years ago. So I come to breakfast and started eating. A minute later, my mom says, "You have to go to CSA."

WHAT.

Apparently, my brother failed a subject, so I had to go get his report card.

Being back at Colegio San Agustin was part interesting, part horrifying. I never want to actually go there on a whim. I'd rather not expire my welcome there, like some of my batch mates (who goes there at least once every two weeks. Seriously.)

But I found the best way to come back old school was to be accompanied by an old school friend; we were friends since 4th grade, drifted apart, and eventually became college blockmates. And of all places should we meet again, it was back there. Apparently he was there on business, selling shirts.

If there's one thing I'm genuinely proud of about my school, it's the cafeteria. That long, three court wide, cafeteria which caters to more-or-less an adolecents' choice of various cuisines, from grilling to french to pinoy-style to even Shakeys (a dumb down version though). Too bad most of the stalls were closed already and we had to settle with buttered corn with cheese.

Anyway, we saw in the field, a bunch of COCCs, or officers in training for Aerospace Cadet Program training for 4th year students. Then I personally thought how impossibly useless that training is in their lifetime beyond high school. I mean, you torchure yourself under the sun, camp in the middle of the field, and eat obscurely flavored food during training, all for what? A commanding power for the fourth year? For just ten months really.

Then you eventually graduate from high school and enter the mysterious world of college as a frosh and you're back to ground zero, doing community service. Everything is on equal ground again. Sure it might be useful when a war breaks out, but considering the populace of the high school? I'm pretty sure they'd just migrate and abandon the country instead.

At least it was good exercise.

Why So Serious

Wed, 15 Oct 2008 15:25:44 +0000

I got in the elevator with somebody I didn't know personally.

then he says:

"Ang serioso mo naman."

My brain died.

I wanted to curl up and hide under a rock.

In A Slump

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 16:53:21 +0000

I want to write.

I want to write something earth shattering and profound. But that entails me to write bullshit I'll never follow in the long run.

Fact of the matter is, I'm bored, and when I'm bored I get to see the state I am in. There's no distractions like work or the occasional geek out to divert me from realizing where I am.

Fact of the matter is, without distractions, I realize that I'm trapped between a rock and hard place. I don't see myself getting further than where I am.

That's not to say I've gone far, because I don't think I did.

---

Bye iPod.

Adrift

Fri, 15 Aug 2008 06:16:41 +0000

Life Over Love

Sun, 27 Jul 2008 19:44:50 +0000

"Love is a sacred madness". - Renaissance Proverb

It's the first time I've seen anyone cry like that.

An idiot, to which we shall call Geeklord, cried in a middle of a party because of his sad and pathetic love life. He tells his audience about on how he gives himself until his graduation to get some lovin' or else he offs himself.

...

Seriously.

I've only met him that one time. He took away my respect for him the moment when he said he requires a girlfriend and once tried to kill himself over it. My brain was laughing while Geeklord lamented and bawled over his failure. I remained stoic, trying to be physically rational and be as "comforting". I was just apathetic to his situation because it's just so irrelevant, and ultimately futile to his cause.

Crying because his life is such a failure does not help it improve.

Geeklord has deluded himself into thinking that getting a girlfriend trumps anything else he has. He does not mind that he has other people to support him, and possibly care for him. All that matters is that he gets a girlfriend.

When he does snuff himself, the world would probably be a smarter place to live in.

Is love from a girlfriend that important to give up everything?

I think it's so overhyped that it's making people delusional that once they have someone, it will solve their problems.

It's insane.

Am I crazy to think love isn't enough reason to die for?

The Epicenter of Phail

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 15:48:47 +0000

Molinia Velasco: when u fail u attract people who equally fail
Mark Cham: HENCE YOU!!!!
Mark Cham: AND ME!!!
Mark Cham: AND EVERYBODY IN OUR SHARED SOCIAL CIRCLE
Molinia Velasco: YES
Mark Cham: its the epicenter of phail
Molinia Velasco: WE ARE THE EPICENTER OF PHAIL

Discuss.

Rak Hang Siam (2007)

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 12:56:54 +0000

I am normally not a fan of romance stories. It's deluded and fantastical that it raises the viewers' expectations for their own sweet and happy ending. It's a pessimistic point of view but that's the reality I've seen so far, I'm used to it.

Rak Hang Siam (The Love of Siam), a Thai film by Chookiat Sakveerakul, tells an amazing story that cross cultural differences, and this maybe the prime reason why the movie is amazing.

For the complete review, go to my Multiply page.

Urduja (2008)

Sat, 21 Jun 2008 16:14:32 +0000

I am not a cartoonist, nor an animator, nor a general 2D person. Professionally speaking, I avoid project that requires animation and movement. I hate it and I hate the technicalities involved with it.

Now Urduja is a good try, considering the various factors that dictate that everything else that could make it so much MUCH worse.

For the complete review, go to my Multiply page.

Frighteningly Lonely

Fri, 13 Jun 2008 19:53:57 +0000

"So I have a question. If we can love somebody so much how will we handle it the day when we are separated? And if being separated is a part of life, and you know about separation well, is it possible that we can love someone and never be afraid of losing them? At the same time, is it possible that we can live our entire life without loving anyone at all?

That's my loneliness." - Mew, Rak Hang Siam